Drop your shorts
By Perry

This past Sunday in an Italian league soccer match-up between Catania and Torino, three players from the Catania team dropped their shorts.  This is the newest, creative strategy that is used to block the goaltender’s vision of the ball.  Nothing better than to confuse the keeper with a pair of balls in order to block his site of the soccer ball.

And guess what?  It worked.  The three Cantania players dropped their shorts (to their knees) during a kick by fellow teammate Giuseppe Mascara.  Torino goalie Matteo Sereni couldn’t see the kick and the ball found the net.  The goal ended up being the difference in Cantania’s 3-2 victory.  

This got me thinking.  Can this be done in other sports?  And if not, what creative strategies can we think of that are similar to this maneuver?

  • Can a basketball player drop their shorts in an attempt to stop a basketball from being passed in between their legs?  Would their lateral movement be effected?  Can they drop their shorts during an opposing teams’ free throw to try to distract them?  Or do the balloon-like noise makers already do that?
  • Can Randy Moss pull down his pants, moon the Packer fans, and wipe his bum on the field goal post?
  • Can Bill Buckner drop his pants so ground balls don’t go through his legs?  Again, will that effect his lateral movement?  Actually, does he still play?  If not, can I swap Bill Buckner with Akinori Iwamura?
  • Can Charles Haley drop his pants in the locker room?
  • In an attempt to motivate the 49ers, can a coach…lets say Mike Singletary…drop his pants to show his players what part of their body is getting kicked? 
  • Can a hockey player drop his shorts to screen the goalie?  Probably not a good idea if you want to have babies.  Maybe Travis Henry and Jason Caffey should play hockey and drop their shorts?  They don’t need any more kids.  They have a combined 19 kids by 17 different women (as far as we know).  What are the odds that one of those women has a kid from both Travis and Jason?  I’ll set the odds at 25-to-1.

Alright, I’m done.  Feel free to chime in.  Let’s hope no clothes are coming off in the WNBA, right fellas?

In Baseball, Basketball, Football, Hockey, Soccer November 19, 2008

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