Seven-time Tour champion Lance Armstrong announced that he will be riding in the Tour De France in 2009.  For those who don’t speak French, Tour De France stands for Tour Of France.  For those who don’t follow the Tour De France, I will let you know that it is a bike race held in some European country.  I think like Spain or Portugal, or something. 

PHOTO CAPTION:  A rare photo of Lance Armstrong and Matthew McConaughey toghether with their shirts actually on.

When I say ‘bike race’ these aren’t motor bikes.  They are the kind of bikes that you see people riding in front of you when you’re trying to drive your car, but you can’t get around them because there’s another car coming the opposite way, so you have to wait till that car passes you while you are honking your horn going 10 mph.

It has yet to determined whether Lance Armstrong’s bike will be a two-seater that he will share with Matthew McConaughey, his really good friend who is by no means gay.