Former Olympic swimmer Josh Davis told San Antonio police that three of his 1996 Olympic gold medals and one 2000 Olympic silver medal were stolen from his minivan last weekend.

San Antonio police responded, “Who the hell is Josh Davis?”

PHOTO CAPTION: Leave the swimming to the mobula rays, Josh Davis, the mobula rays.

Davis told the San Antonio Express-News that a reward of a “couple thousands bucks” will be given to the person who returns the medals.

The San Antonio Express-News responded, “Who the hell are you?”

Lesson learned here?  If as a young adult you dedicate yourself  to the Olympics, your future will consist of losing your precious medals and driving a minivan with only a few thousand dollars to spare.