December 18, 2014

Martellus Bennett tackles the issues

martellusbennettThe Dallas Morning News made a great decision in asking Cowboys TE Martellus Bennett to blog for them. He struggles a bit with the written word, but it shouldn’t matter because his keen insight on life will make up for it. So what does he blog about? Women farting. We’re serious. I wonder what the editor of the DMN thinks of this great content.

Man what do you do if your chic farts?It doesn’t seem as if women
should fart. I was walking in the grocery store in the chips and dips
aisle. This lady was walking in front of me pushing her cart she
stopped to pick up some pringles and let one rip. Sounded like a growl
and and a motor but smelt like a dead carcus. OMG! Now I knew it
wasn’t me LOL and we were the only two people on the aisle. She just
smiled and kept walking like nothing happened the smell followed her.
I swear I could see it like smoke out of a train just nasty.
My boy told me he was kissing a girl and she gave him a silent killer.
This is definitely a mood killer. Do you continue to kiss her? This is
a WWMBD moment (What Would Marty B Do). I would of definitely stop
kissing her LOL and asked her if she was ok. But this is what he did
he started sniffing the air and asked her if she smelled what he
smelled. She said naw I don’t smell anything, and kept it moving. He
asked her again you sure you don’t smell anything and she said yes
hunny I’m sure. Then she asked what it was he smelled he started
laughing and said oh nothing.
I guess women have to let go at times too but it just doesn’t seem
right, but if they do then it shouldn’t smell or make a sound. I mean
come on if you were on a date with Angelina Jolie a lunch date eating
spaghetti and pancakes or whatever it is people eat in Hollywood and
as she’s feeding you she farts. Do you let her slide because of her
beauty or call her out?