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Photo Caption: “Jim, stop being a dick. You know what time it is in Moscow. That joke stopped being funny a long time ago.”

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“A Brave what?”, Micah would have said if we were able to reach him or if he returned our messages.

Even still, congratulations to Micah and Perry for collecting more hardware than Bryant McKinnie before he leaves for a date.

You are probably wondering why he would get an award for picking a guy to get that honor when he was not even dressing towards the end of the season. It’s simple, the award falls into the Brave Choice category, and you get the award for making a brave choice, not for being right.

“Another one?”, Perry asked when we told him the good news via cell phone while he was eating corn chips and possibly touching himself in his bed on a lazy Saturday afternoon. “Yeah…that’s uh….that’s great. Good stuff. Can I uh……can I call you back in a little bit? Just…finishing some things.”

Vernon Gholston is considered a bust by many, and OTR would like to congratulate Perry for picking him as a potential Defensive Rookie of the Year. A Brave Choice, indeed.

Perry was the first to make a post in the new year, thus making him eligible for the award.

“I don’t even know what to say right now, these last few days have just been such a whirlwind,” Perry said via AOL Instant Messenger. “Between the Blog of the Year award, the Fantasy Turd League…and now this. I think for the first time in my life I’m speechless. Usually I’m LOL’ing or LMAO’ing or something, but this is something different. I guess it’s just one of those things where you put the trophy up next to the others and keep moving forward. In a couple years, you come home from the newsroom and your day didn’t go well and you look up at that trophy and think, ‘well, there sure was that one day when I wasn’t too bad.’”

Photo Caption: “I’m putting my trophy right there!”

Perry declined to say how he was going to spend the prize money that comes with The First Post of 2009 award.

“Are you kidding,” he exclaimed. “I can’t even think about that right now. I’m just trying to digest all this. After I make all my phone calls I’ll worry about that. This isn’t about money. Never has been.”

It was a long, arduous voting process, but in the end, Perry and I counted up the votes and OTR won the award by a vote of 2-0. Mittens, the OTR dog, abstained.

Some people might be skeptical because there were only two voters and Perry and I made up both of them. But keep in mind it was a secret ballot, which validates everything.

Again, thank you so much! We wish all of our readers reasonably decent health and for-the-most-part happiness for 2009!